How to Disappear completely

I hope you know that Radiohead song. If not,
A. I feel sorry for you
B. Listen to it NOW. (click)
Because it inspired me to write a short story. In fact, I don't feel like posting the story on Blogger, so read it here instead.

Progress Update

So here's the deal: I got five chapters of that scifi story done, but things are not quite going so well now. The first five chapters represent the first section, but I'm not exactly sure if I should continue. I just don't have that magical inspiration anymore. So if I don't feel like continuing, I might post what I've got so far, but it's not of the purest writing.

Aside from that, I have another story going. I won't reveal the details, but it was inspired by Death Note. I'll try not to copy anything from Death Note, but that won't be too hard, because I've only seen it once anyway. So... big city, college campus, involves death.

Monochrome

The sun hid itself that day. The clouds flooded the sky like the ocean's lap upon the beach at high tide. Cold wind suffused the forest with the breath of some great unknown force. The inanimate trees dripped of rain as the sky lost its dying light.

The thin mist echoed with the clear voice of an upright piano. Its music calmed the air, but it also sided with arising darkness and the cold wind. In a small isolated gazebo, a young man sat and played expressively, waving his head to the music and quietly singing lucid notes.

Resolving to the final chord, his fingers searched for the right keys, and with a sigh, his hands descended with relent. The sound echoed throughout the forest and in his mind. As he closed the piano's cover cautiously and left along a faint trail, humming to the music that guided his path.

He swam in a river of thought. He could feel the puzzled eyes of the oblivious staring at him, wondering what he was thinking. He was pressed by the outgoing nature of those in his life, who considered him abnormal for spending time alone.

All these troubles entered his sight as he left his sanctuary and headed home. Emerging from the fog, a house appeared in faint color. He disappeared from the forest. So the sun set behind a cloud veil.

The next day he returned. Flakes of crisp snow collected on the soaked ground as grey clouds scrolled past the landscape. He paced slowly through the air.

Finding a dry place, he sat and thought. The forest seemed alive to him, alive with the chilling and calming wind, the gentle snow that decorated the ground, and the shadows of clouds that marched across the sky like ominous spirits. He felt connected to the unknown supernatural force that gave him life, as through meditation he breathed with it. "God" he called it. Its ways were unknown to him, for he had been raised in an atheistic family, and he was merely an agnostic himself. He only faintly held on to the belief that it existed, for now it seemed closed to him. At times it seemed like a set of rumors to answer all of the common questions, but now it seemed so alive in his mind, the mind which he had questioned.

He continued his meditation on the piano, composing music of mysterious subconscious worlds with such emotion that echoed in the winter sky. He had always seemed to find a way to express his emotions through music, whether rational or irrational. Now, as those emotions resonated in the open landscape, all was finished.

A Letter

Dear John the Person,
It has come to my attention that you have thoroughly enjoyed the month of June as a pleasant vacation from the droning hours of school work. I am glad to see this. Certainly vacationing to the mountains, playing and writing music, taking beautiful pictures, and writing inspiring poetry is a good way to relax one's mind. However, the whole month of June has passed. How quickly it has flown by indeed! And with the entire month of July to use, I reckon that you could find something to do during that month also. Especially considering that you, a borderline, unmotivated Academic Magnet student, have hours and piles of work to do. Has it not occured to you that annotating two (and possible three) books may take some time? You shouldn't worry about time; you have plenty of that. You should worry about using your time. I know that you are aware that your morals of time use are quite arbitrary and inconsistent. The problem is that you take this half-truth and use it to sustain itself, using it as an excuse for why you don't do your work. Furthermore, I must point out that if you want to have any sort of significant inspiration in your life, books are the way to go. How you despised books. Were they boring? Surely not. Just the idea of facing 300 pages of paper for hours and hours seemed absolutely ridiculous to you. Of course, how could people waste their time so? But now, here you are, wasting your time looking at comedy sketches online. Surely a simple pleasure in life, but not one that actually has any long-term contribution. From this point on, you must challenge yourself to keep a truly open mind to books, as open as you have been to all various types of philosophy and the like. You just need something to get you interested in learning. You want to change your life, so you must now. Oh, I can just hear the reluctant complaints running through your head, polluting the air with such foulness that makes the idea seem absurd. What a paradox this is. You can't change until you feel confident that you can, and you can't feel confident until you do. John, I just want to point out that you must be aware of such a paradox with that maze of a mind of yours. How difficult a maze it is! Oh, the subject of motivation arbitrarily strikes it, seeping its way into it during times of deep inspiration, while most of the time it is ignored as a distraction, but of course, all else must be a distraction. So after you have used up your time looking around at pointless amusements, I really must insist that you spend some time doing some work. For you have longed to become some sort of landscape designer, haven't you? You can see yourself sitting on top of a stone arch in a beautiful ranging garden of wondrous works, priding yourself on your accomplishments. Well deserved pride that would be. But you must remember that simple pleasures are a distraction from the meaninful existence that you can possibly contribute to the world. The future John that sits upon that stone arch of accomplishment could surely tell you how he spent days and days loitering in the pit of laziness, watching the world go by, and how he really learned the hard way to motivate himself. Perhaps somewhere between the pen and the paper, the finger and the keyboard, you could find that passionate inspiration and let it sweep you away...
Cordially, John the Person

Words, words, words

Dear reader,
I suppose you might be kind of not really intrigued/interested in my story. But that's okay, because I pretty much told you nothing about it. Well, I have a plan:
Words to intrigue you:

technology phenomenon understand meaningless beliefs influential humanity dream science complex geographical imprinted New Earth Overseer birth pleasures death awakening darkness tank undernourishment evacuated cell compartments sustenance

Those are real words. From chapters 1-2.
BTW, totally making serious progress on chapter 3 here.

Update: Sci-fi all the way

I think I'm on to something here. I have been writing a sci-fi story. I don't know how long it will turn out, but I've got an introduction and two chapters. I am currently working on the third. I probably won't post it until I finish it completely, which may take a while, considering that I've got a lot of plot to go through and I will have to revise it when I'm done. Plotwise, I've got the intro/exposition down, and I am working on kind of the "woah this is messed up" stage. It will be worth it, I promise you. I've been feeling rather inspired, and I can get this done. In fact, it kinda makes me want to change my background from happy pretty grass to steampunk sci-fi. Oh well. I don't even know how/when I'll publish it. So I guess if you're bored enough to actually care about it, you could check out this game that kind of inspired it:
Exit Path
I can't wait for the second one to come out.

Human

Ah, where shall I begin?

Well, I've been thinking recently about what humans are and what makes us special, but I haven't really done much... This is kind of a continuation of my entry on consciousness, since I do find that topic to really be the center of all philosophy and such. So I guess I'll write about what it means to be human. That sounds really cheesy, by the way.
Why not kick it off with an allusion?
This is a song called "Human" by a band called Civil Twilight. You should listen to it and all, but here are some of the lyrics:

It's only love; it's only pain
It's only fear that runs through my veins
It's all the things you can't explain
That make us human

I am just an image of
something so much greater
I am just a picture frame
I am not the painter

Where can I begin?
Can I shed this skin?
What is this I feel?
...

If you didn't get much of that, they basically say that the meaning of being human is feeling emotions and (please don't kill me if I misinterpreted this, but I'm pretty sure what it means) being religious. I am religious, but religions aside for now, let's analyze this whole thing:
I believe that humans have a feeling of consciousness that is not detectable in any of the common five senses (or the little known/cared about others such as hunger, pee, ... (not esp, don't get excited)), but in a way, people are aware of their own existence. Self awareness, it is. So in reality, nothing is sure, nothing can be proven, but one's own existence.

So anyway, being serious now, some people might say that the human mind acts according to the laws of physics, and everything is an intense chemical reaction, and consciousness is an illusion. I say differently because of the idea of technological development. The second law of thermodynamics states that things become less complex, but people and their technology do the opposite. Of course, there's this whole argument over a closed system and what that is and how people are becoming complex, but I support this belief:

A mechanical mind such as a robot cannot evolve. Why? Because it's not programmed to. Why? because it doesn't know how to invent things and think outside of the box. Why? Because it is perfectly logical, and it has no perception of being wrong. If it could behave irrationally and be wrong like the people, it could evolve.

So that means that consciousness leads to irrational behavior, which leads to discovery, development, and invention. So in a way, logic is a restriction that computers can never rise above, and irrationality is a virtue.

So like Civil Twilight said, emotions make people human. And of course, emotions are quite irrational. So there you have it, folks. Maybe if I have time/feel motivated enough I'll get into the religious side of it later.